The Joy of the Holidays! Or, Maybe Not!!
How Emotions, Feelings and Mood Play a Role in Our Holidays
As I write this I am already overwhelmed at the onslaught of Christmas advertising. Of course, the perfect family, the perfect gift, and the perfect food and decorations are being portrayed as the ‘normal’ holiday celebration. For me, this begs the question: “How is my brain reacting to all of this hoopla? What does the brain do with all of this input – and, how do I process it?”
Emotions are autonomic, largely unconscious behavioral or cognitive responses to a significant event or object. They are lower level responses occurring in the subcortical regions of the brain.
Feelings are our conscious, often physical experiences of that emotion. They originate in the neocortical regions of the brain, are mental associations and reactions to emotions, and are subjective being influenced by personal experience, beliefs and memories. (Debbie Hampton, The Best Brain Possible).
Moods set the ‘threshold’ for emotions. Mood is longer lasting and untethered to circumstances. Dr. Sarah McKay
“Emotions connect body to brain. Emotion links one person to another,” Dan Siegel
The Neurobiology of Emotions
The Limbic System sits under the cerebrum and is the major primordial brain network underpinning mood. There are regions of the brain fundamental to mood. It is the network of regions that work together to process and make sense of the world.
Emotions are the whole-body phenomenon’s that activate the Peripheral Nervous System, Limbic System (including the amygdala), and frontal lobes. Emotions involve neural transmitters and hormones, and affect the immune system, cardiovascular system, and other systems. (Dr. Sarah McKay)
The neurotransmitters serotonin and dopamine are chemical messengers that send signals across the networks. This results as recognizing objects and situations; assigning them an emotional value to guide behavior and assigning a risk/reward assessment. All of these actions occur below our level of awareness. Our brain is preparing how we feel and react to the circumstances that come our way.
There are major players in the limbic system:
The amygdala is the emotional center of the brain – attaching emotional significance to events and memories
The hippocampus is the center for new learning and memory. It reminds us which courses of action are compatible with our mood
The hypothalamus modulates hormones associated with mood and survival.
What are Emotions, Moods and Feelings?
Now that we know the regions of the brain that direct responses in relation to our environment – let’s find out what these responses are:
Affect: a generic term that covers a broad range of feelings that people experience
Emotions: intense feelings that are directed at someone or something
Moods: feelings that tend to be less intense than emotions
Emotions and Mood generally influence each other. Affect is the experience – the feelings – in the form of emotion and mood.
Affect
Defined as a broad range of feelings that people experience.
Affect can be experiences in the form of emotions or moods.
Emotions Moods - Caused by a specific event - Cause is often general and unclear
- Very brief in duration (seconds or minutes) - Last longer than emotions (hours or days)
- Specific and numerous in nature - More general (two main dimensions (many specific emotions such as anger, positive affect and negative affect- fear, surprises, sadness, happiness, disgust) that are comprised of multiple specific emotions)
- Usually accompanied by distinct facial - Generally not indicated by distinct expressions expressions
- Action-oriented in nature - Cognitive in nature
The Role of Emotions, Moods and Feelings in Our Holiday Celebrations
We all come to the holidays with a different emotional mindset in place. Our life experiences around the holidays can determine if we choose to be joyful or if we choose to be glum. And that experience can change throughout our life. What is intense however, is the assumption that the holidays are an exciting, happy time for all of us. We then experience the pressure of trying to act and be something that we just aren’t feeling at this time of year. Here are some suggestions on how to handle the bag of emotions we are carrying – whether it us excitement or stress.
Acknowledge the Bag: What’s inside your bag of emotions? Happiness, sadness, grief, stress, anxiety, dread or excitement? Take a moment to think about this, acknowledging each of your emotions and how they influence your mood.
Slow Down: You’ve heard this many times before. Do you have five minutes before you fall asleep, 30 seconds to smile at a stranger, a small break at work to bring yourself back to the present of the time spent in the car? Whatever it is, take the time to slow yourself down, recognize the emotional benefits, and just be.
Give: When we think of giving during this time of year images of sugar plums and presents often pop into our heads. Beyond this, giving of time, space, and energy are all ways in which the receiver AND giver can fill their emotional bags with positive feelings.
Traditions: Embrace the traditions you have and create new ones. This can look different for everyone and can be difficult if you are in a time of transition however, traditions provide a sense of stability in one’s life and can reduce stress in an efficacious way.
Gather: Call up a friend you’ve been meaning to get together with, invite family over for a meal, volunteer, or attend holiday happenings around your town. Connecting with others during the holiday season is a great way to combat feelings of loneliness and provide a sense of fulfillment in a way that is unique to everyone.
(Michele Owens, Relate Counseling Center)
Wherever you are on the emotional spectrum, there are a few practical tips you can do to make your holidays more enjoyable.
Adjust your expectations:
The pressure around the holiday season can be overwhelming. Media is filled with tips for decorating, preparing lavish meals and giving gifts. If you can not relate to this picture – it’s okay – research indicates that holidays rarely match people’s expectations. Through numerous studies – it was revealed that those who expected to feel great reported that their mood wasn’t quite as high as they anticipated; and, people who expected to feel miserable hadn’t felt that bad.
Make accommodations for change:
Holidays are a stark reminder that life changes as you age. You may not be able to contribute as you once did; or, celebrations may move to your children’s homes. Forming realistic expectations can go a long way in helping you adapt to life changes.
Narrow your focus:
Dr. Ann Epstein, clinical instructor in psychiatry at Harvard Medical School, says, “Holidays can arouse feelings of ambivalence in most of us. It’s normal to dread some aspects of the approaching season while eagerly anticipating others.” She suggests focusing on one or two things that you associate most positively with the holidays, whether going through family albums or enjoying seasonal music. Doing so is likely to relieve stress and unlikely to leave you with regret and disappointment.
Opt out if you want to:
Dr. Epstein advises that it may help to be prepared for things that have marred your holidays in the past. If the holidays are associated with a loss that is still fresh, don’t feel obligated to celebrate exuberantly. You don’t want to find yourself on the way to a family gathering wishing that you were back home with a good book. Have a Plan B – which might include spending less time at family gatherings, finding a less emotionally fraught way to observe the season, or even declaring a holiday hiatus for a year.
Harness the holiday spirit:
If you are one of those who are fueled by the energy of the season, enjoy! While you are celebrating, you may also be extending your life. According to a review of 35 studies on the relationship of emotional well-being to longevity, such feelings as positive mood, joy, happiness, vigor, and energy are associated with lower death rates, not just in healthy people but also in people with chronic disease.
Harvard Women’s Health Watch, October, 2014
So here is to the Holidays!!
“And if all else fails, remember in a few short weeks, this will be behind us. So pour yourself an eggnog and get cracking!” Andrea Kinnison
References:
Hampton,D. (January 12, 2015). What’s the difference between feelings and emotions? Retrieved Novemebr 27, 2017 from https://www.thebestbrainpossible.com/whats-the-difference-between-feelings-and-emotions/
Harvard Health. (October, 2014). A holiday advisory for your emotions. Retrieved November 27, 2017 from https://www.health.harvard.edu/mind-and-mood/a-holiday-advisory-for-your-emotions
Hume,D. Emotions and Moods. Retrieved November 27, 2017 from http://catalogue.pearsoned.co.ik
Owens,M. The Holiday Season: A Mixed Bag of Emotions. Retrieved Novemebr 27, 2017 from http://relatemn.org/wp-content/staffarticles/The-Holidays-Emotions.pdf
Raynor,G. (September 30, 2016). This is how the brain shapes our emotions and moods. Retrieved November 27, 2017 from https://www.weforum.org/2016/09/feeling-happy-sad-this-is-how-the-brain-manages-emotion-and-mood
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